Finally, after months of filling out tedious application forms and having endless conversations with your parents about responsibility, you're ready to pack up and head off into the unknown. Finally you can stop worrying about SAT scores and curfews. The flip side is that you won't be as well-known as you are in high school. You may even stick out like a rapper at a pop concert.

No matter how many movies you've seen, or how many stories your older brother or sister have told you, you simply can't prepare for what college life will really be like. Oh sure, you can fantasize. You'll picture yourself as the "man" or "woman" of campus, floating from party to party as if you have an all-access VIP card stuffed in your brand-new backpack. The truth is simply this: you're a freshman -- and everyone will know it.

Incoming frosh are the butt of a lot of jokes made around campus. Many upperclassmen find them cocky and ignorant, and tend to be a little on the cruel side when given the opportunity. It's one of the few drawbacks college life has, and one that can definitely cramp your style. But never fear! There are several telltale signs of a first-year student. I'll clue you in to what they are, how to avoid them, and ways to spare yourself the indignity of losing face in front of your friends.

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"MAPPUS CONFUSUS"
Translation: Not knowing where you are on campus.

This is the easiest way to spot a new student. You know the type -- he's walking around with a huge, unfolded campus map, stopping every 15 feet to ask for directions.

Not knowing where your classes are is a common problem, and anyone who tells you he always knew he was going is lying. But this is the easiest problem to remedy. First, take a map of your campus and shrink it to fit inside one of your notebooks. Then, take two hours out of your day to walk the campus before classes start. Take your course schedule with you, and follow your resized map to each class.

This is a smart move to get a feel for your surroundings before the grounds are crowded with people who actually know where they're going. And, it'll save you from having an embarrassing moment like walking into a nude art drawing class instead of "Intro to Art History."

"SENIORITIS RIDICULOUS"
Translation: Forget about high school!

Trash that "Seniors Rock" T-shirt, put away the yearbooks, and stop talking about the good ol' days of Mr. So-and-So's wild and crazy algebra class. High school was great, but it's over.

To avoid getting stuck down memory lane, head over to the campus bookstore and get yourself some new gear. Buy a hat, a T-shirt, or something with your college's name on it. Pride in your school is a college constant, and is almost expected. Take down that graduation tassel you have dangling from your rearview mirror and put up a college decal instead. This shows that you don't dwell on the past, and that you're ready to look to the unforeseen future of college.

"YOUGOTTABE KIDDINGUS"
Translation: Trying too hard to look good in class.

This one is a little confusing, so allow me to explain. Every year, we see freshmen dressed up in brand new "school outfits" usually worn to clubs or parties. They strut around campus in expensive get-ups, with top-of-the-line backpacks and pens that match their three-ring binders and day planners. While most parents think this is a good idea, it can serve as the big distinction between a wet-behind-the-ears freshman and a seasoned student.

Look at any college student and you'll see that nobody really cares what they wear to class. Many students roll out of bed each morning, walk to class in flip-flops, and use one five-subject notebook to cover every class. Attending class is considered the thing to do when you aren't socializing, so wearing name-brand gear and saturating your neck with high-priced cologne is a waste of time.

The best advice is to relax and go casual. After all, you don't want to look like you're trying too hard to impress your classmates. Keep it low-key; wear whatever you see first in your closet (as long as it's clean and wrinkle-free). A word to the ladies: Save the high heels and miniskirts for the party scene. You'd be amazed at how much simpler life is in the morning when you can just grab a T-shirt and head off to that class you're already running late for.

"MAN-US?"
Translation: Don't try too hard to be liked by everyone.

Like I said before, everyone has that dream of being the popular kid on campus, going from party to party like you're an A-list celeb. But when you get to school, you'll find out that the definition of the word popular has changed. There is no cool kids table in the cafeteria. There is no "in" or "out" crowd -- just different crowds.

Freshmen have a bad habit of being loud and cocky out of fear that they won't be liked unless they are the stereotypical crazy college person we've seen in many movies. In reality, that kind of behavior is often viewed as childish. Don't worry about getting into a certain fraternity or sorority, or about everyone hating you. You don't have to be the center of attention to make a statement. Relax, talk to people, and you'll make friends. I promise.

Other common freshman stand-out behaviors include excessive drinking, being disruptive in class, skipping class, and hitting on every girl or guy who walks campus grounds -- all done in an attempt to appear cool. Clearly, these constitute adolescent behavior, which should be left back in high school, along with your "Seniors Rock" T-shirt and yearbook. I'm not saying you shouldn't have fun and go to parties -- let's not forget that you are in college. Just realize that college upperclassmen are old enough to detect when you're trying to impress them, and that attracts the worst kind of attention -- the negative kind.

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By now you're hopefully ready to make your way through campus without giving yourself away as a freshman. And relax, it's only for a year. After that, you'll have a whole new wave of freshmen to take the heat for you. And when you see them strutting around campus with their high school T-shirts and brand new day planners, you'll smile to yourself and thank me for preventing you from making such a mistake. Do take it easy on them, though. They probably haven't read this article.

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