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Let's face it: Food is an important part of life. Sacred, even. When you're hungry the whole world seems to reek. Throw in a writing class and a chemistry lab and you've got a recipe for serious disaster. So, how do you avoid the hunger pangs when you're too poor to eat outside the  

dorm

  cafeteria and too afraid to eat the dorm food? Two words: creativity and initiative.

Dorm food has the inescapable stigma of being stomach-wrenching disgusting. But it doesn't have to be. Sure, after three days in a row of questionable-looking meat that gets progressively ground smaller and smaller until it becomes a part of the slop inside an even more questionable-looking casserole, anyone's bound to be disgusted. But there's more to dorm food than said slop. Here are some tips to keep the hunger pangs in a state of silence:

Get to Know the "Lunch Lady"
Take the initiative and get to know your dorm cafeteria management. There are people whose whole job is to think up ways to feed you. Talk to them. Introduce yourself and offer your comments. If you really dig a chocolate cream pie they have one day, tell the manager. If you really hate the selection of main dishes, tell the manager. Be generous with both your positive and negative comments and don't be afraid to give a lot of comments period. The more your cafeteria's management hears from you, the more they'll trust what you have to say.

As the dorm cafeteria manager at Brigham Young University puts it: "This is a business, just like any other place. If no one eats here, I have no job. We want the customer to be happy."

Cook Up Some Creativity
If the main course offered inspires guttural heaves, you can make something else for yourself if you have the right tools. Ask the management to keep on hand supplies to make sandwiches and salads. Ask for a microwave and a toaster, a spice rack, and a large supply of cereal.

At my dorm cafeteria someone took the initiative to go to management and ask for a waffle iron. The result? A corner of the cafeteria was turned into the waffle corner where seven days a week, three meals a day there was a big vat of waffle batter and a hot waffle iron. Management can't know what you want if you don't ask them for it. Maybe they'll say no, but then again, maybe they won't.

Create a Combo To Go!
No one can tell you how to be creative with your food, but here are some recipes I've seen made with dorm food:
Spaghetti Noodle Salad
A plateful of spaghetti noodles topped with a green salad, garbanzo beans, and ranch dressing. Especially useful when you suspect that the meat in the spaghetti sauce is left over from Sunday dinner and its Wednesday.
Toasted Tomato and Cheese
A slice of bread topped with a slice of tomato and cheese and toasted in the toaster oven until the cheese is gooey and the bread is crisp.
Cream of Mushroom Rice with Vegetables
Pour a bowlful of cream of mushroom soup (or any other kind of creamy soup) half full. Fill the rest of the bowl with rice and whatever vegetables they happen to be serving. Mix. You can also add seasoning if you like. I've heard nutmeg, lemon peel, thyme, curry, dillweed and ginger work well, but you may want to experiment on your own.
Crunchy Yogurt
Try mixing a bowlful of yogurt with anything that sounds good. Dried fruit, cereal, wheat germ, nuts, even rice.
Topped Potato
Take a baked potato (or bake one for yourself - 10 minutes in the microwave) and top it with salsa and sour cream, or pork and beans, or spaghetti sauce, or cream of broccoli soup, or whatever else is available. Be daring.
Crackers and Ketchup
Take a plateful of crackers - Saltines or Ritz crackers work best - and top them with cheese and a small drop of ketchup. Microwave until the cheese is melted.

Spice It Up!
Remember, you can do a lot to spice up your food if the cafeteria keeps on hand a generously stocked spice rack. For a Cajun flavor, mix white, black, and red hot pepper, smoke flavor, garlic, and onion. For a barbecue flavor, mix sugar, garlic, onion, salt, and smoke flavor. To make something taste like pizza, add oregano, basil, fennel, and onion.

Don't Stop There... Check out some individual herbs and what they spice up best:
Basil: "minty and clovelike," basil is good with fish, chicken, sandwiches, and spaghetti sauce
Chives: good with soups, salads, potatoes, and vegetables
Cilantro: good with salsa, sauces, and bean dishes
Oregano: makes things taste more like pizza; use in bean soups, and pasta salads
Parsley: good with everything
Rosemary: good with any roasted meat or tomato dishes; use with basil
Sage: "slightly bitter with a musty mint taste," sage is good with chicken and stuffing
Tarragon: known for being used in French food, tarragon adds spice to chicken and grilled meat
Thyme: good with vegetables and chicken

Living on campus doesn't mean you have to live with hunger. Surviving in a dorm cafeteria is as simple as deciding to do it. Be creative. Talk to management. Don't be passive with something as sacred as your food.

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